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longsufferinglyI was writing something totally different than this yesterday. Like, two totally different things, even. And then I somehow ended up writing this. The world is full of mysteries!
I also wrote a very little Sam/Dean (with 404 spoilers) here.
Title: Never Was Quick on the Uptake
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: R
Warnings: Real person fiction, Chad Michael Murray.
Word Count: ~4600 words.
Summary: AU. Jared Padalecki meets Jensen Ackles when UPN and the WB hook up.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Jared doesn't hate network events or anything, but it kind of feels like the first middle school dance right now. Except instead of the boys being on one side and the girls on the other, it's the UPN on one side and the WB on the other.
Of course there are actors Jared knows on UPN--Kyle Gallner seems kind of torn between Smallville and Veronica Mars and keeps flitting between the two sides of the room like a crazy hummingbird--but they're not friends. And Jared isn't actually friends with most of his own cast at this point, which doesn't fucking help. Sometimes he wishes they had decided that Dean Forester wasn't Rory Gilmore's one and only and had kept the breakup real. Not because he doesn't like the show or work, but--it's really awkward, dating your ex-girlfriend on TV. He's at least been assured this season really will be the last, and even if it's not--his contract's seven years. He can flee, if he has to.
He catches Chad's eye and makes his way over that direction, snagging another flute of champagne as he goes. He doesn't want to get drunk and make an idiot of himself, but he definitely wants to get drunk. After all, the drunker Jared is, the friendlier he is, and maybe if he gets enough liquid courage in him, he can be the first one to go ask the girls to dance. Jessica Alba is definitely looking good tonight, and he wouldn't mind getting know her.
"Dude, this is the lamest thing ever. No one's even drunk yet," Chad complains when Jared slips into the One Tree Hill pack.
"I'm doing my best," Jared says.
"Yeah, take one for the team, bitch," Chad agrees, chugging his own drink.
"If I'm taking one for the team, what are you doing?" Jared asks.
"Taking one for me. Jesus Christ, I hate these things."
"Don't let the press hear you say that."
"They've probably heard me say worse."
Jared considers this. "You've gotta work on this. You're a teen heartthrob, man. Be a good influence."
"Like Dean fucking Forester, perfect gentleman boyfriend extraordinaire?"
Jared flips him off lazily. He glances back over at the UPN group, cocks his head. "You know the guy from Dark Angel?"
Chad looks over too. "Which guy? Ackles?"
"The one who's staring at us, yeah."
"He had a guest spot on Dawson's that year his show was canceled," says Chad. "Met him a couple times when I was up visiting."
"Looks like he wants you to go make friendly."
Chad snorts. "He's an anti-social little bitch. Probably just wants anyone to come talk to him."
Jared tries a wave, and the Ackles guy looks startled and looks away, blushing a little. Jared's caught his show a couple times, has always been fairly impressed with the dude's acting--he's got good comedic timing, does well with the overly dramatic drama, and he gets to make out with Jessica Alba on a regular basis without letting his hormones take over, which Jared probably couldn't do. He didn't realize Chad knew him, but Chad knows a lot of people, and Jared's just kind of glad they don't do coke together or something. It's plausible with Chad, but Jared likes when that isn't the first thing he finds out about people. It makes his life less awkward.
"Come on," Jared says, "let's go say hi."
"You wanna go fraternize with Ackles? Come on, man, at least pick a hot chick."
"He knows Jessica Alba," Jared points out. "And aren't you engaged?"
"Bitch, I can still look. I'm not going to cheat on her or some crap."
Jared rubs his forehead. "Whatever. Let's just do something, man. I'm fucking bored."
Chad waves his hand, grabs more booze, and wanders across the room toward where Ackles is hanging out with some other UPNers. Ackles looks pretty surprised they're coming over, but quickly recovers, putting his face into some bad imitation of friendly invitation. Jared privately thinks it's kind of hilarious; the guy's a decent actor, but he sucks at it in real life.
"Sup, Ackles," says Chad. "This is my friend Jared. He's got a big old mancrush on Alec."
Jared smacks Chad in the back of the head. "Do I ever reveal your mancrushes, Chad? Come on."
"Dude, watch the hair!" Chad protests. "I spent hours styling that to perfection."
"How can that much hair take hours? You suck, man."
Ackles is watching them with a kind of bemused expression, looking faintly out of his depth with their easy banter. Jared flashes him a grin and reaches his hand over to offer it. "Jared Padalecki. I don't really have a mancrush on you."
Ackles takes it. "Jensen Ackles. I'll keep that in mind."
"I like the show okay and all," Jared keeps going, "but I don't really keep up that well. Kind of busy, you know?"
"You're on Gilmore Girls, right?" asks Jensen, tilting his head. When Jared raises his eyebrow, Jensen blushes again. "Shut up, my ex liked it."
"Yeah, we're still going," Jared says, taking pity. "I hear we're on our last legs, though."
Jensen nods. "Us too, man. We're already zombie show."
"Yeah, can't believe they let you on a network with people as awesome as us after you already got canned once," says Jared, and Jensen laughs, grins.
It's a surprising grin, Jensen's. In all the episodes of Dark Angel he's caught channel surfing, he's never seen it on Alec. He thinks it's the complete genuineness, no edge of self-deprecation or sarcasm. Just grinning because he's amused, maybe even happy; no deeper reason than that.
Jared falters his response--that's how much the grin throws him off. Actors don't grin like that. Jared grins like that, but Jared, he's kind of weird. His friends tell him that all the time, that he needs to learn to hide this shit, that he needs to be more jaded. But here's Jensen Ackles, doing the same thing, and Jared feels this strange kinship for him.
Then a heavy arm clamps down around Jensen's shoulder and Jared's shocked to see Michael Rosenbaum and Tom Welling making nice. Jared knows Welling and Rosenbaum, of course. They're on the same network, so they meet at network events. It's not a shock. But it's a surprise that they apparently know Jensen--Rosenbaum's never gotten friendly enough with Jared to give him one-armed hugs in public, and Jared's really good at getting past people's personal bubbles.
"Jenny, Jenny. We're like sisters now!" says Rosenbaum.
Jensen rolls his eyes. "Like I didn't see enough of you assholes before."
"Man, stuff like that? You're going to make Tom cry." Rosenbaum shoots Jared a conspiratorial look and stage-whispers, "He's a crier."
"Shut up, Mike," says Welling. He looks at Jared. "Padalecki, right?"
"Yeah. Nice to see you again." He and Welling shake hands. Rosenbaum's still focused on Jensen.
"Your team's losing tomorrow, I hope you know that."
"Whatever," says Jensen. "You like the Pats. Where's your New York pride?"
"Your team's the Cowboys?" asks Jared.
"Jenny's a hick," says Rosenbaum, with a sad sigh.
"Shut up," says Jensen, shoving Rosenbaum away from him. "Richardson's got, like, twenty times the population of your crappy town."
"But my crappy town is in New York."
Jared's planning to ask Jensen about Texas, but he belatedly notices something worrying. "Hey, where'd Chad go?"
"He's hitting on Kristen Bell," says Jensen, pointing over.
"Fucking--" Jared sighs. "He's engaged. I gotta go."
"Nice to meet you, Jared," says Jensen, flashing him that grin again, and Jared falters, just a little. It's--actors don't do that.
"Yeah, you too," says Jared, grinning back.
*
So Jared starts looking for Jensen Ackles at network events, because he pretty much likes Jensen Ackles. He's a nice guy, and Jared--Jared wants to get to know anyone in Hollywood who's got a smile that good.
Besides, Alexis always brings Milo to network events, even though he's on NBC now and should be out of Jared's hair. It's not like Jared is afraid of Milo, but the last thing he wants to do is get in a fight with the guy in public.
"I'm so far from interested in his girlfriend," grumbles Jared, watching Milo shoot daggers at him from across the room. If one of Peter Petrelli's superpowers was laser-beam eyes, Jared would honestly be concerned for his life.
Jensen pats him consolingly on the shoulder. "You do make out with her on a weekly basis."
"Not because I want to!" Jared objects. Then he adds, "Hey, I thought your ex was the one who watched Gilmore Girls."
Jensen blushes. "I catch it when I've got time. Come on, don't tell me you don't watch Dark Angel."
"Dark Angel isn't aimed at preteen girls," Jared points out.
"I think Gilmore Girls is more for teens. Preteen girls don't know they're supposed to be attracted to you yet."
"So what you're saying is you're a teenage girl with a crush on me," crows Jared.
"I was," says Jensen, still blushing. "Til I met you and found out you're a total asshole."
"I'm hurt!" says Jared. "You want me to stop hanging out with you at these?"
"Nah, I always wanted Milo Ventmiglia to hate me by association."
"Hey, if you talked to him for five minutes, he'd probably hate you for you."
"You trying to talk me out of being your friend, Jared?" asks Jensen, lazy smirk on his face.
"Just want you to admit you're hanging out with me cuz I'm awesome."
"I just don't know anybody else," says Jensen, and Jared socks him in the arm.
*
After that, Jensen seems to start taking being his friend seriously; he gets text messages and e-mails and phone calls when Jensen's bored, and it's kind of awesome. For all Jared's a social guy, he doesn't have a lot of friends. He hangs out with the people on the set of whatever he's doing, but he hasn't stayed in touch with the vast majority of them. It's really just Chad, pretty much, and if that isn't a sad commentary on his life, Jared doesn't know what is.
So he appreciates having Jensen around to be someone he knows who he's never been in a show with but talks to anyway. It makes his mother scold him way less on the phone.
"Maybe you could get a job on Jensen's show," she suggests, when he tells her that whether or not Gilmore Girls gets renewed, he's done with it. "He sounds like a nice boy."
"I could be a genetic freak," says Jared happily. "But he says they're probably getting canned soon too."
His mother laughs at this, moves on, and Jared doesn't tell her he actually is auditioning for something out Jensen's way, because he likes the role too much to get her hopes up. If he doesn't get it, he doesn't want her asking about it or anything.
He does tell Jensen, mostly because he wants to know if he can crash on Jensen's couch. Once Jensen let slip he had a real apartment in Vancouver, Jared got kind of set on the idea.
"Dude, don't you have other friends?" asks Jensen when he calls to ask.
"In Vancouver? No way. Vancouver sucks."
"Which is why you're trying for a show up here," says Jensen, "clearly."
"I just want to be a whole country away from Milo fucking Ventmiglia."
"I think you could take him. This might come as a shock, but you've got this height advantage."
"Seriously?" asks Jared, mock-shocked. "How come no one ever told me that?"
Jensen laughs, and it's such a good sound Jared can't help feeling smug. Jensen Ackles thinks he's funny. Possibly in the touched-in-the-head way, but Jared doesn't even care. He's fucking awesome and he knows it.
"So, you gonna let me crash on your couch?"
Jensen lets out a long sigh. "You're too big for my couch. I don't want you to crush it."
"I'll see you on Saturday," says Jared happily.
"Yeah, yeah."
*
"When'd you and Ackles become crashing-on-his-couch friends?" asks Chad.
Jared considers. "After we hung out at, like, the third network party."
"Dude," says Chad. "Ackles doesn't even have friends."
"You don't have friends," Jared mutters.
"Your mom doesn't have friends," Chad retorts. Then he continues, "Ackles is, like. Man, I dunno. I didn't know he liked people."
"He hangs out with Welling and Rosenbaum."
"Yeah, but does he like them?"
Jared considers this. "Huh."
"He's gotta like you," says Chad. From his tone, it sounds like he thinks this should make Jared feel weird.
It doesn't, though. It makes Jared feel awesome. "Yeah," he agrees. "I guess he does."
*
Jensen greets Jared in the Vancouver airport with a sign that says "Dean Gilmore" on it, and Jared punches him in the shoulder.
"I hate you so much."
"I could leave you here to die," Jensen points out.
"In the airport? That's cold, man."
"I come to get you and let you stay in my apartment and the first thing you say is you hate me? How am I the cold one right now?"
Jared grins. "Aww, you just want to be loved. Should have said so, Jensen." And then he wraps Jensen up in a giant hug.
Jensen flails a little and pats him on the back.
Jared holds on a little longer and then smiles more genuinely. "Really, thanks."
Jensen ducks his head and blushes. "No problem, Jared."
*
It occurs to Jared when they're in the car that this should maybe be awkward. He and Jensen don't actually know each other. Like, they have short conversations and chat, but they've never been in the same room together for more than three hours or so, and they haven't talked for more than an hour at a time. He just kind of forgot that. Because with Jensen, things just feel kind of natural, like being friends was something they were always supposed to do.
"Seriously, man, I appreciate this," he says. "I could be some psycho killer or something."
Jensen raises his eyebrow. "Yeah, I'm sure that's it. You're totally going to rape and murder me in the night. I've heard the stories about you, Padalecki."
"Always said you shouldn't listen to Rosenbaum," says Jared, sighing. "Honestly, you rape and murder the guy one time and he never lets it go."
Jensen laughs, and Jared's doubts just kind of vanish. Because Jensen's an awesome guy, and Jared's an awesome guy, and the Spurs are playing the Mavs tonight, so they're clearly going to have an awesome time watching the game and insulting each others' hometowns.
Jared settles back in shotgun, props his hands behind his head, rests his feet against the glove compartment.
Jensen shoves him. "Dude, keep your freak feet off my nice car."
"Bitch bitch bitch."
*
Jensen is the third person Jared calls when he gets the Psych role, which he realizes right before Jensen picks up is kind of bizarre.
"Hello?" Jensen asks.
"Got that part," says Jared. "You're gonna have to put up with me way more than you used to."
"Aren't you going to have your own cast to bug?" asks Jensen.
"Why would I bug them when I could bug you?"
"Because if we're not on the same network, you don't need me for parties," says Jensen.
"Can't I just like you?" asks Jared, grinning.
"You're way too nice for this business, Padalecki," says Jensen, sighing. "Congratulations, man. I'm really happy for you," he adds genuinely.
"Thanks," says Jared, and his whole body feels kind of warm and light. He's proud of himself too now--not that he wasn't before or anything, but. It's nice to hear someone else say it, someone who isn't his mom or his agent, because his mom is always proud of him, and his agent is paid to be proud of him. "Couldn't have done it without your couch."
"I'll pass that on," says Jensen. Jared can hear voices on the other end of the phone, and Jensen calls something back. "They need me on set," he says. "But I'll talk to you later, yeah?"
"Yeah. Bye."
"Bye, Jared. Congratulations, again."
Jared looks at his phone for a long minute after the phone disconnects, trying to calm his smile before he calls Chad. Because somehow Chad will hear and recognize that Jared called Jensen first and Jensen made him happy. And then Chad will be pissy and upset.
"So, guess who's gonna be on Psych," says Jared by way of greeting when Chad does pick up.
"Your giant ass? You tell your boyfriend yet?" asks Chad.
"My boyfriend?" asks Jared, genuinely confused.
"Ackles."
Jared pushes his bangs out of his face. "How do you do that?"
"Man, I can't believe you told him first!" says Chad, sounding more proud of himself for guessing than pissed off.
"He let me sleep on his couch when I did the audition! So he gets some credit here."
"Whatever, bitch. You're such an ingrate. I've been putting up with you for years."
"Not on your couch."
"You're bigger than my whole house," Chad points out. Then he adds, "Seriously, Jay, what's up with you and Ackles?"
"We're friends?" says Jared. He's not sure what Chad's talking about. Not that this is new.
"You talk about him all the time, man. You guys hang out. If I was a girl, I'd be jealous."
"Aww, you're totally jealous now, aren't you?" says Jared, grinning. "Don't worry, Chad, I'll always love you. You're the Buttercup to my Westley. I don't even care how dumb you are."
Chad hangs up. Jared can't really blame him.
*
The last CW network event of the year is in March, and Jared isn't sure if he's glad or sad that it's his last one for...well, at least the next season. He doesn't want to get too optimistic, but he's done for a while anyway. He already feels a little nostalgic. What's his life going to be like without Milo Ventmiglia trying to kill him with his mind? It's a crying shame.
"You going to miss the glamor or the company more?" Jensen asks.
"Glamor," says Jared instantly, gesturing to the completely hideous and cheap decorations they've got around. "I still get to hang out with you, and I couldn't get rid of Chad if I tried."
"Why don't you try?" asks Jensen.
"He followed me home," says Jared, sighing. "I had to keep him."
"Feed him and walk him every day?"
"Twice a day if I can. Dude's got the world's smallest bladder."
Jensen snickers. "So, you in L.A. for the summer?" he asks. His voice sounds a little weird, and Jared figures it's the booze.
"Nah, back home. My mom wanted me to spend some time with the family before I jet off to Vancouver."
"Yeah?" asks Jensen, sounding excited by this. "I'm gonna be home too. Well, near home. Doing a play in Fort Worth."
Jared grins. "So that's practically next door."
"And a few hours drive, yeah," says Jensen, grinning back.
"What's a few hours between friends?" asks Jared, and Jensen's smile? It's almost blinding.
*
Somehow, Jared doesn't see it coming at all.
It's his first full weekend in Vancouver; the filming isn't starting yet, he just decided to come up early, settle in. Jensen's around too; he knows this intellectually, but he didn't think Jensen would be calling for a while. Not that he'd really put much thought into when and how he'd hang out with Jensen, but after a summer of random weekend meet ups and Jared's mother cooing over Jensen and making him stay for meals, he thought Jensen might want a break.
But his phone rings on Saturday morning and the caller ID's clear as day.
"Hey!" says Jared.
"Hey," says Jensen, sounding weird. "How's the new place?"
"Awesome, man," says Jared, leaning over the sink to start his breakfast dishes soaking. "Feel like a real movie star, living out of a hotel."
Jensen laughs, but it's still off. "So, uh, listen," says Jensen, and Jared considers a lot of possible followups to this, but none of them are what Jensen says. "You free tonight?"
"Yeah, should be," says Jared easily. "Why?"
"Want to get dinner with me?" asks Jensen. It comes out fast, like Jensen is trying to just get it out, and forced casual, like Jensen really, really cares about the answer.
Jared knows that tone, remembers asking Alexis out with that tone, and a hundred girls before her, and holy fucking shit, Jensen Ackles is asking him out on a date.
Jared's so shocked he drops his phone into one of the bowls he's soaking. It snaps shut and Jared swears.
He's trying very hard to think. The first step is clearly to get his phone out of the sink. Then to breathe. Then make sure the phone works. Somewhere down there in the steps, he needs to call Jensen back, because hanging up on a date invitation? Jared is nowhere near that much of a bastard.
But the thing is, he needs an answer for Jensen too. Does he want to go on a date with Jensen Ackles? Sure, Jensen is hot and funny and great to hang out with and somehow became one of Jared's best friends without Jared even noticing, but Jared's never really tried the whole dating a guy thing before.
He tries to picture a date with Jensen. They've always been pretty easy with conversation, and adding food isn't going to hurt. And if Jensen wanted to kiss him at the end of the date, Jared doesn't think he'd actually mind. Because Jensen Ackles is hot, and Jared's seen him kissing on Dark Angel and he looks pretty good at it.
Jared blinks and calls Jensen back.
"Sorry," is what Jensen says when he picks up. "Seriously, man, I didn't mean to--"
"I dropped my phone in the sink," says Jared. "In a bowl of soapy water. I'm awesome."
Jensen lets out a laugh, like he wasn't planning to but just can't help it. "Wow."
"So," says Jared brightly, "what time were you thinking for dinner?"
He can hear Jensen's smile, real smile, nice and smooth and easy, when he replies, "How's seven for you?"
"Seven's awesome," says Jared, and fuck if Chad wasn't kind of insightful with all that boyfriend teasing.
*
"So your ex who liked Gilmore Girls," says Jared over his steak.
"He really did," says Jensen. "Because he thought Milo was hot."
Jared snorts. "Seriously?"
"Yeah. Me, I kind of thought you were hotter."
Jared smirks. "Clearly."
"I forgot you'd be at that CW thing, though. Couldn't believe you and Murray came over to talk to me when you caught me staring."
Jared can't help a surprised laugh. "You were looking at me!"
"What'd you think I was looking at?"
"Chad. Figured you knew him, and he said you did. But you liked me."
Jensen blushes, and all the blushing makes so much more sense now that he knows Jensen's into him. "Fuck you," mutters Jensen. "It's not like that's why I got to know you."
"Yeah it was," says Jared smugly. "You were charmed by my manly prowess and dashing good looks."
"Certainly wasn't your winning personality," Jensen replies, still blushing a little, but giving as good as he gets, and Jared blinks back the strong urge to kiss him.
Then Jared remembers he's on a date with Jensen, who likes him, so there's really no reason to resist that urge. He leans across the table, careful not to brush their meals with any part of his body, and presses his lips to Jensen's, smiles against the noise Jensen makes before he pulls back.
"Dude," says Jensen. "Warn a guy."
"Way more fun if I don't," says Jared.
Jensen gives him the finger half-heartedly, but he's still smiling.
"So, you really are a teenage girl with a crush on me," says Jared smugly.
"You can't say I didn't warn you," Jensen points out.
Jared is actually incapable of not smiling.
*
It's pretty awesome, as first dates go.
"You should've ask me out months ago," says Jared, stretching his arms up as they leave. "Seriously, I'm pretty slow to get stuff, but once I do I catch on pretty fast."
Jensen shakes his head. "Would've if we actually, you know, lived in the same country. And I wasn't going to drive four hours just for a date with you."
"You saying I'm not worth it?" asks Jared.
"You weren't gonna put out at your parents' house," Jensen points out.
"Think I'm gonna put out now?"
"I did pay for dinner," Jensen points out.
"Dude, if I'd known I had to put out, I would've paid half. Then I just have to give you a handjob."
Jensen barks a laugh. "Are you for real?" he asks, sounding somewhere between fond and terrified.
"About handjobs?"
"You aren't even bi and you're..." Jensen gestures. "This isn't supposed to be easy for me. I thought you were gonna, like, dump me as a friend because our entire relationship was a lie."
Jared shrugs. "Kinda like you."
"Kinda?" asks Jensen, raising his eyebrow, but still looking...Jared doesn't really care enough to break down all the weird emotions Jensen's got going. The bottom line is, Jared's way more okay with this than he expected, but that's not a bad thing. Right now, it's an awesome thing.
He pushes Jensen up against the wall of the building they're passing, kisses him again, a real kiss this time.
It's not like kissing Alexis at all; way less neck strain, for one, and Jensen's body is solid beneath his, his arms hot under Jared's hands. And Jensen surges back like Alexis never did, kisses him back just as hard as Jared's kissing him, like he doesn't appreciate being shoved against a wall and manhandled and wants to get his own back. He can feel Jensen trying to keep their dicks apart, too, like he's worried Jared will have some kind of negative reaction to his hard-on. Jared grinds his own cock against Jensen's leg, just to make the point that, really, he doesn't, and Jensen gasps into his mouth.
"You are the fucking weirdest straight guy ever," says Jensen, hitting his head against the wall as he pulls back and takes shaky gulps of air.
"Apparently I'm not straight," says Jared.
"Apparently, he says," Jensen grumbles, pushing Jared away. "I freaked out for years."
"Well, I'm awesomer than you," says Jared easily. "Where are you going?"
"My apartment. We're not having sex against a wall."
"But we're having sex, right?"
"Yes, Jared, we're having sex."
"Just making sure," says Jared, and trots after Jensen like a lost, horny puppy.
*
Jared calls Chad to gush about how awesome his first week of filming was.
"You tell your boyfriend first?" asks Chad with a long-suffering sigh.
Jensen's in the kitchen, trying to cook a frozen pizza. This is, in theory, not difficult, but Jensen is somehow making it hard for himself. There are instructions on the back. Maybe Jensen is illiterate. Jared should ask him about that.
Still, it's somehow endearing, and Jared can't help smiling in Jensen's direction, knowing that the expression comes out stupid and sappy. But, well. He really likes Jensen.
"Yeah," he says, not caring at all that Chad can probably hear how much of a girl he's being right now. "I did."
I also wrote a very little Sam/Dean (with 404 spoilers) here.
Title: Never Was Quick on the Uptake
Author:
chashFandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: R
Warnings: Real person fiction, Chad Michael Murray.
Word Count: ~4600 words.
Summary: AU. Jared Padalecki meets Jensen Ackles when UPN and the WB hook up.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Jared doesn't hate network events or anything, but it kind of feels like the first middle school dance right now. Except instead of the boys being on one side and the girls on the other, it's the UPN on one side and the WB on the other.
Of course there are actors Jared knows on UPN--Kyle Gallner seems kind of torn between Smallville and Veronica Mars and keeps flitting between the two sides of the room like a crazy hummingbird--but they're not friends. And Jared isn't actually friends with most of his own cast at this point, which doesn't fucking help. Sometimes he wishes they had decided that Dean Forester wasn't Rory Gilmore's one and only and had kept the breakup real. Not because he doesn't like the show or work, but--it's really awkward, dating your ex-girlfriend on TV. He's at least been assured this season really will be the last, and even if it's not--his contract's seven years. He can flee, if he has to.
He catches Chad's eye and makes his way over that direction, snagging another flute of champagne as he goes. He doesn't want to get drunk and make an idiot of himself, but he definitely wants to get drunk. After all, the drunker Jared is, the friendlier he is, and maybe if he gets enough liquid courage in him, he can be the first one to go ask the girls to dance. Jessica Alba is definitely looking good tonight, and he wouldn't mind getting know her.
"Dude, this is the lamest thing ever. No one's even drunk yet," Chad complains when Jared slips into the One Tree Hill pack.
"I'm doing my best," Jared says.
"Yeah, take one for the team, bitch," Chad agrees, chugging his own drink.
"If I'm taking one for the team, what are you doing?" Jared asks.
"Taking one for me. Jesus Christ, I hate these things."
"Don't let the press hear you say that."
"They've probably heard me say worse."
Jared considers this. "You've gotta work on this. You're a teen heartthrob, man. Be a good influence."
"Like Dean fucking Forester, perfect gentleman boyfriend extraordinaire?"
Jared flips him off lazily. He glances back over at the UPN group, cocks his head. "You know the guy from Dark Angel?"
Chad looks over too. "Which guy? Ackles?"
"The one who's staring at us, yeah."
"He had a guest spot on Dawson's that year his show was canceled," says Chad. "Met him a couple times when I was up visiting."
"Looks like he wants you to go make friendly."
Chad snorts. "He's an anti-social little bitch. Probably just wants anyone to come talk to him."
Jared tries a wave, and the Ackles guy looks startled and looks away, blushing a little. Jared's caught his show a couple times, has always been fairly impressed with the dude's acting--he's got good comedic timing, does well with the overly dramatic drama, and he gets to make out with Jessica Alba on a regular basis without letting his hormones take over, which Jared probably couldn't do. He didn't realize Chad knew him, but Chad knows a lot of people, and Jared's just kind of glad they don't do coke together or something. It's plausible with Chad, but Jared likes when that isn't the first thing he finds out about people. It makes his life less awkward.
"Come on," Jared says, "let's go say hi."
"You wanna go fraternize with Ackles? Come on, man, at least pick a hot chick."
"He knows Jessica Alba," Jared points out. "And aren't you engaged?"
"Bitch, I can still look. I'm not going to cheat on her or some crap."
Jared rubs his forehead. "Whatever. Let's just do something, man. I'm fucking bored."
Chad waves his hand, grabs more booze, and wanders across the room toward where Ackles is hanging out with some other UPNers. Ackles looks pretty surprised they're coming over, but quickly recovers, putting his face into some bad imitation of friendly invitation. Jared privately thinks it's kind of hilarious; the guy's a decent actor, but he sucks at it in real life.
"Sup, Ackles," says Chad. "This is my friend Jared. He's got a big old mancrush on Alec."
Jared smacks Chad in the back of the head. "Do I ever reveal your mancrushes, Chad? Come on."
"Dude, watch the hair!" Chad protests. "I spent hours styling that to perfection."
"How can that much hair take hours? You suck, man."
Ackles is watching them with a kind of bemused expression, looking faintly out of his depth with their easy banter. Jared flashes him a grin and reaches his hand over to offer it. "Jared Padalecki. I don't really have a mancrush on you."
Ackles takes it. "Jensen Ackles. I'll keep that in mind."
"I like the show okay and all," Jared keeps going, "but I don't really keep up that well. Kind of busy, you know?"
"You're on Gilmore Girls, right?" asks Jensen, tilting his head. When Jared raises his eyebrow, Jensen blushes again. "Shut up, my ex liked it."
"Yeah, we're still going," Jared says, taking pity. "I hear we're on our last legs, though."
Jensen nods. "Us too, man. We're already zombie show."
"Yeah, can't believe they let you on a network with people as awesome as us after you already got canned once," says Jared, and Jensen laughs, grins.
It's a surprising grin, Jensen's. In all the episodes of Dark Angel he's caught channel surfing, he's never seen it on Alec. He thinks it's the complete genuineness, no edge of self-deprecation or sarcasm. Just grinning because he's amused, maybe even happy; no deeper reason than that.
Jared falters his response--that's how much the grin throws him off. Actors don't grin like that. Jared grins like that, but Jared, he's kind of weird. His friends tell him that all the time, that he needs to learn to hide this shit, that he needs to be more jaded. But here's Jensen Ackles, doing the same thing, and Jared feels this strange kinship for him.
Then a heavy arm clamps down around Jensen's shoulder and Jared's shocked to see Michael Rosenbaum and Tom Welling making nice. Jared knows Welling and Rosenbaum, of course. They're on the same network, so they meet at network events. It's not a shock. But it's a surprise that they apparently know Jensen--Rosenbaum's never gotten friendly enough with Jared to give him one-armed hugs in public, and Jared's really good at getting past people's personal bubbles.
"Jenny, Jenny. We're like sisters now!" says Rosenbaum.
Jensen rolls his eyes. "Like I didn't see enough of you assholes before."
"Man, stuff like that? You're going to make Tom cry." Rosenbaum shoots Jared a conspiratorial look and stage-whispers, "He's a crier."
"Shut up, Mike," says Welling. He looks at Jared. "Padalecki, right?"
"Yeah. Nice to see you again." He and Welling shake hands. Rosenbaum's still focused on Jensen.
"Your team's losing tomorrow, I hope you know that."
"Whatever," says Jensen. "You like the Pats. Where's your New York pride?"
"Your team's the Cowboys?" asks Jared.
"Jenny's a hick," says Rosenbaum, with a sad sigh.
"Shut up," says Jensen, shoving Rosenbaum away from him. "Richardson's got, like, twenty times the population of your crappy town."
"But my crappy town is in New York."
Jared's planning to ask Jensen about Texas, but he belatedly notices something worrying. "Hey, where'd Chad go?"
"He's hitting on Kristen Bell," says Jensen, pointing over.
"Fucking--" Jared sighs. "He's engaged. I gotta go."
"Nice to meet you, Jared," says Jensen, flashing him that grin again, and Jared falters, just a little. It's--actors don't do that.
"Yeah, you too," says Jared, grinning back.
*
So Jared starts looking for Jensen Ackles at network events, because he pretty much likes Jensen Ackles. He's a nice guy, and Jared--Jared wants to get to know anyone in Hollywood who's got a smile that good.
Besides, Alexis always brings Milo to network events, even though he's on NBC now and should be out of Jared's hair. It's not like Jared is afraid of Milo, but the last thing he wants to do is get in a fight with the guy in public.
"I'm so far from interested in his girlfriend," grumbles Jared, watching Milo shoot daggers at him from across the room. If one of Peter Petrelli's superpowers was laser-beam eyes, Jared would honestly be concerned for his life.
Jensen pats him consolingly on the shoulder. "You do make out with her on a weekly basis."
"Not because I want to!" Jared objects. Then he adds, "Hey, I thought your ex was the one who watched Gilmore Girls."
Jensen blushes. "I catch it when I've got time. Come on, don't tell me you don't watch Dark Angel."
"Dark Angel isn't aimed at preteen girls," Jared points out.
"I think Gilmore Girls is more for teens. Preteen girls don't know they're supposed to be attracted to you yet."
"So what you're saying is you're a teenage girl with a crush on me," crows Jared.
"I was," says Jensen, still blushing. "Til I met you and found out you're a total asshole."
"I'm hurt!" says Jared. "You want me to stop hanging out with you at these?"
"Nah, I always wanted Milo Ventmiglia to hate me by association."
"Hey, if you talked to him for five minutes, he'd probably hate you for you."
"You trying to talk me out of being your friend, Jared?" asks Jensen, lazy smirk on his face.
"Just want you to admit you're hanging out with me cuz I'm awesome."
"I just don't know anybody else," says Jensen, and Jared socks him in the arm.
*
After that, Jensen seems to start taking being his friend seriously; he gets text messages and e-mails and phone calls when Jensen's bored, and it's kind of awesome. For all Jared's a social guy, he doesn't have a lot of friends. He hangs out with the people on the set of whatever he's doing, but he hasn't stayed in touch with the vast majority of them. It's really just Chad, pretty much, and if that isn't a sad commentary on his life, Jared doesn't know what is.
So he appreciates having Jensen around to be someone he knows who he's never been in a show with but talks to anyway. It makes his mother scold him way less on the phone.
"Maybe you could get a job on Jensen's show," she suggests, when he tells her that whether or not Gilmore Girls gets renewed, he's done with it. "He sounds like a nice boy."
"I could be a genetic freak," says Jared happily. "But he says they're probably getting canned soon too."
His mother laughs at this, moves on, and Jared doesn't tell her he actually is auditioning for something out Jensen's way, because he likes the role too much to get her hopes up. If he doesn't get it, he doesn't want her asking about it or anything.
He does tell Jensen, mostly because he wants to know if he can crash on Jensen's couch. Once Jensen let slip he had a real apartment in Vancouver, Jared got kind of set on the idea.
"Dude, don't you have other friends?" asks Jensen when he calls to ask.
"In Vancouver? No way. Vancouver sucks."
"Which is why you're trying for a show up here," says Jensen, "clearly."
"I just want to be a whole country away from Milo fucking Ventmiglia."
"I think you could take him. This might come as a shock, but you've got this height advantage."
"Seriously?" asks Jared, mock-shocked. "How come no one ever told me that?"
Jensen laughs, and it's such a good sound Jared can't help feeling smug. Jensen Ackles thinks he's funny. Possibly in the touched-in-the-head way, but Jared doesn't even care. He's fucking awesome and he knows it.
"So, you gonna let me crash on your couch?"
Jensen lets out a long sigh. "You're too big for my couch. I don't want you to crush it."
"I'll see you on Saturday," says Jared happily.
"Yeah, yeah."
*
"When'd you and Ackles become crashing-on-his-couch friends?" asks Chad.
Jared considers. "After we hung out at, like, the third network party."
"Dude," says Chad. "Ackles doesn't even have friends."
"You don't have friends," Jared mutters.
"Your mom doesn't have friends," Chad retorts. Then he continues, "Ackles is, like. Man, I dunno. I didn't know he liked people."
"He hangs out with Welling and Rosenbaum."
"Yeah, but does he like them?"
Jared considers this. "Huh."
"He's gotta like you," says Chad. From his tone, it sounds like he thinks this should make Jared feel weird.
It doesn't, though. It makes Jared feel awesome. "Yeah," he agrees. "I guess he does."
*
Jensen greets Jared in the Vancouver airport with a sign that says "Dean Gilmore" on it, and Jared punches him in the shoulder.
"I hate you so much."
"I could leave you here to die," Jensen points out.
"In the airport? That's cold, man."
"I come to get you and let you stay in my apartment and the first thing you say is you hate me? How am I the cold one right now?"
Jared grins. "Aww, you just want to be loved. Should have said so, Jensen." And then he wraps Jensen up in a giant hug.
Jensen flails a little and pats him on the back.
Jared holds on a little longer and then smiles more genuinely. "Really, thanks."
Jensen ducks his head and blushes. "No problem, Jared."
*
It occurs to Jared when they're in the car that this should maybe be awkward. He and Jensen don't actually know each other. Like, they have short conversations and chat, but they've never been in the same room together for more than three hours or so, and they haven't talked for more than an hour at a time. He just kind of forgot that. Because with Jensen, things just feel kind of natural, like being friends was something they were always supposed to do.
"Seriously, man, I appreciate this," he says. "I could be some psycho killer or something."
Jensen raises his eyebrow. "Yeah, I'm sure that's it. You're totally going to rape and murder me in the night. I've heard the stories about you, Padalecki."
"Always said you shouldn't listen to Rosenbaum," says Jared, sighing. "Honestly, you rape and murder the guy one time and he never lets it go."
Jensen laughs, and Jared's doubts just kind of vanish. Because Jensen's an awesome guy, and Jared's an awesome guy, and the Spurs are playing the Mavs tonight, so they're clearly going to have an awesome time watching the game and insulting each others' hometowns.
Jared settles back in shotgun, props his hands behind his head, rests his feet against the glove compartment.
Jensen shoves him. "Dude, keep your freak feet off my nice car."
"Bitch bitch bitch."
*
Jensen is the third person Jared calls when he gets the Psych role, which he realizes right before Jensen picks up is kind of bizarre.
"Hello?" Jensen asks.
"Got that part," says Jared. "You're gonna have to put up with me way more than you used to."
"Aren't you going to have your own cast to bug?" asks Jensen.
"Why would I bug them when I could bug you?"
"Because if we're not on the same network, you don't need me for parties," says Jensen.
"Can't I just like you?" asks Jared, grinning.
"You're way too nice for this business, Padalecki," says Jensen, sighing. "Congratulations, man. I'm really happy for you," he adds genuinely.
"Thanks," says Jared, and his whole body feels kind of warm and light. He's proud of himself too now--not that he wasn't before or anything, but. It's nice to hear someone else say it, someone who isn't his mom or his agent, because his mom is always proud of him, and his agent is paid to be proud of him. "Couldn't have done it without your couch."
"I'll pass that on," says Jensen. Jared can hear voices on the other end of the phone, and Jensen calls something back. "They need me on set," he says. "But I'll talk to you later, yeah?"
"Yeah. Bye."
"Bye, Jared. Congratulations, again."
Jared looks at his phone for a long minute after the phone disconnects, trying to calm his smile before he calls Chad. Because somehow Chad will hear and recognize that Jared called Jensen first and Jensen made him happy. And then Chad will be pissy and upset.
"So, guess who's gonna be on Psych," says Jared by way of greeting when Chad does pick up.
"Your giant ass? You tell your boyfriend yet?" asks Chad.
"My boyfriend?" asks Jared, genuinely confused.
"Ackles."
Jared pushes his bangs out of his face. "How do you do that?"
"Man, I can't believe you told him first!" says Chad, sounding more proud of himself for guessing than pissed off.
"He let me sleep on his couch when I did the audition! So he gets some credit here."
"Whatever, bitch. You're such an ingrate. I've been putting up with you for years."
"Not on your couch."
"You're bigger than my whole house," Chad points out. Then he adds, "Seriously, Jay, what's up with you and Ackles?"
"We're friends?" says Jared. He's not sure what Chad's talking about. Not that this is new.
"You talk about him all the time, man. You guys hang out. If I was a girl, I'd be jealous."
"Aww, you're totally jealous now, aren't you?" says Jared, grinning. "Don't worry, Chad, I'll always love you. You're the Buttercup to my Westley. I don't even care how dumb you are."
Chad hangs up. Jared can't really blame him.
*
The last CW network event of the year is in March, and Jared isn't sure if he's glad or sad that it's his last one for...well, at least the next season. He doesn't want to get too optimistic, but he's done for a while anyway. He already feels a little nostalgic. What's his life going to be like without Milo Ventmiglia trying to kill him with his mind? It's a crying shame.
"You going to miss the glamor or the company more?" Jensen asks.
"Glamor," says Jared instantly, gesturing to the completely hideous and cheap decorations they've got around. "I still get to hang out with you, and I couldn't get rid of Chad if I tried."
"Why don't you try?" asks Jensen.
"He followed me home," says Jared, sighing. "I had to keep him."
"Feed him and walk him every day?"
"Twice a day if I can. Dude's got the world's smallest bladder."
Jensen snickers. "So, you in L.A. for the summer?" he asks. His voice sounds a little weird, and Jared figures it's the booze.
"Nah, back home. My mom wanted me to spend some time with the family before I jet off to Vancouver."
"Yeah?" asks Jensen, sounding excited by this. "I'm gonna be home too. Well, near home. Doing a play in Fort Worth."
Jared grins. "So that's practically next door."
"And a few hours drive, yeah," says Jensen, grinning back.
"What's a few hours between friends?" asks Jared, and Jensen's smile? It's almost blinding.
*
Somehow, Jared doesn't see it coming at all.
It's his first full weekend in Vancouver; the filming isn't starting yet, he just decided to come up early, settle in. Jensen's around too; he knows this intellectually, but he didn't think Jensen would be calling for a while. Not that he'd really put much thought into when and how he'd hang out with Jensen, but after a summer of random weekend meet ups and Jared's mother cooing over Jensen and making him stay for meals, he thought Jensen might want a break.
But his phone rings on Saturday morning and the caller ID's clear as day.
"Hey!" says Jared.
"Hey," says Jensen, sounding weird. "How's the new place?"
"Awesome, man," says Jared, leaning over the sink to start his breakfast dishes soaking. "Feel like a real movie star, living out of a hotel."
Jensen laughs, but it's still off. "So, uh, listen," says Jensen, and Jared considers a lot of possible followups to this, but none of them are what Jensen says. "You free tonight?"
"Yeah, should be," says Jared easily. "Why?"
"Want to get dinner with me?" asks Jensen. It comes out fast, like Jensen is trying to just get it out, and forced casual, like Jensen really, really cares about the answer.
Jared knows that tone, remembers asking Alexis out with that tone, and a hundred girls before her, and holy fucking shit, Jensen Ackles is asking him out on a date.
Jared's so shocked he drops his phone into one of the bowls he's soaking. It snaps shut and Jared swears.
He's trying very hard to think. The first step is clearly to get his phone out of the sink. Then to breathe. Then make sure the phone works. Somewhere down there in the steps, he needs to call Jensen back, because hanging up on a date invitation? Jared is nowhere near that much of a bastard.
But the thing is, he needs an answer for Jensen too. Does he want to go on a date with Jensen Ackles? Sure, Jensen is hot and funny and great to hang out with and somehow became one of Jared's best friends without Jared even noticing, but Jared's never really tried the whole dating a guy thing before.
He tries to picture a date with Jensen. They've always been pretty easy with conversation, and adding food isn't going to hurt. And if Jensen wanted to kiss him at the end of the date, Jared doesn't think he'd actually mind. Because Jensen Ackles is hot, and Jared's seen him kissing on Dark Angel and he looks pretty good at it.
Jared blinks and calls Jensen back.
"Sorry," is what Jensen says when he picks up. "Seriously, man, I didn't mean to--"
"I dropped my phone in the sink," says Jared. "In a bowl of soapy water. I'm awesome."
Jensen lets out a laugh, like he wasn't planning to but just can't help it. "Wow."
"So," says Jared brightly, "what time were you thinking for dinner?"
He can hear Jensen's smile, real smile, nice and smooth and easy, when he replies, "How's seven for you?"
"Seven's awesome," says Jared, and fuck if Chad wasn't kind of insightful with all that boyfriend teasing.
*
"So your ex who liked Gilmore Girls," says Jared over his steak.
"He really did," says Jensen. "Because he thought Milo was hot."
Jared snorts. "Seriously?"
"Yeah. Me, I kind of thought you were hotter."
Jared smirks. "Clearly."
"I forgot you'd be at that CW thing, though. Couldn't believe you and Murray came over to talk to me when you caught me staring."
Jared can't help a surprised laugh. "You were looking at me!"
"What'd you think I was looking at?"
"Chad. Figured you knew him, and he said you did. But you liked me."
Jensen blushes, and all the blushing makes so much more sense now that he knows Jensen's into him. "Fuck you," mutters Jensen. "It's not like that's why I got to know you."
"Yeah it was," says Jared smugly. "You were charmed by my manly prowess and dashing good looks."
"Certainly wasn't your winning personality," Jensen replies, still blushing a little, but giving as good as he gets, and Jared blinks back the strong urge to kiss him.
Then Jared remembers he's on a date with Jensen, who likes him, so there's really no reason to resist that urge. He leans across the table, careful not to brush their meals with any part of his body, and presses his lips to Jensen's, smiles against the noise Jensen makes before he pulls back.
"Dude," says Jensen. "Warn a guy."
"Way more fun if I don't," says Jared.
Jensen gives him the finger half-heartedly, but he's still smiling.
"So, you really are a teenage girl with a crush on me," says Jared smugly.
"You can't say I didn't warn you," Jensen points out.
Jared is actually incapable of not smiling.
*
It's pretty awesome, as first dates go.
"You should've ask me out months ago," says Jared, stretching his arms up as they leave. "Seriously, I'm pretty slow to get stuff, but once I do I catch on pretty fast."
Jensen shakes his head. "Would've if we actually, you know, lived in the same country. And I wasn't going to drive four hours just for a date with you."
"You saying I'm not worth it?" asks Jared.
"You weren't gonna put out at your parents' house," Jensen points out.
"Think I'm gonna put out now?"
"I did pay for dinner," Jensen points out.
"Dude, if I'd known I had to put out, I would've paid half. Then I just have to give you a handjob."
Jensen barks a laugh. "Are you for real?" he asks, sounding somewhere between fond and terrified.
"About handjobs?"
"You aren't even bi and you're..." Jensen gestures. "This isn't supposed to be easy for me. I thought you were gonna, like, dump me as a friend because our entire relationship was a lie."
Jared shrugs. "Kinda like you."
"Kinda?" asks Jensen, raising his eyebrow, but still looking...Jared doesn't really care enough to break down all the weird emotions Jensen's got going. The bottom line is, Jared's way more okay with this than he expected, but that's not a bad thing. Right now, it's an awesome thing.
He pushes Jensen up against the wall of the building they're passing, kisses him again, a real kiss this time.
It's not like kissing Alexis at all; way less neck strain, for one, and Jensen's body is solid beneath his, his arms hot under Jared's hands. And Jensen surges back like Alexis never did, kisses him back just as hard as Jared's kissing him, like he doesn't appreciate being shoved against a wall and manhandled and wants to get his own back. He can feel Jensen trying to keep their dicks apart, too, like he's worried Jared will have some kind of negative reaction to his hard-on. Jared grinds his own cock against Jensen's leg, just to make the point that, really, he doesn't, and Jensen gasps into his mouth.
"You are the fucking weirdest straight guy ever," says Jensen, hitting his head against the wall as he pulls back and takes shaky gulps of air.
"Apparently I'm not straight," says Jared.
"Apparently, he says," Jensen grumbles, pushing Jared away. "I freaked out for years."
"Well, I'm awesomer than you," says Jared easily. "Where are you going?"
"My apartment. We're not having sex against a wall."
"But we're having sex, right?"
"Yes, Jared, we're having sex."
"Just making sure," says Jared, and trots after Jensen like a lost, horny puppy.
*
Jared calls Chad to gush about how awesome his first week of filming was.
"You tell your boyfriend first?" asks Chad with a long-suffering sigh.
Jensen's in the kitchen, trying to cook a frozen pizza. This is, in theory, not difficult, but Jensen is somehow making it hard for himself. There are instructions on the back. Maybe Jensen is illiterate. Jared should ask him about that.
Still, it's somehow endearing, and Jared can't help smiling in Jensen's direction, knowing that the expression comes out stupid and sappy. But, well. He really likes Jensen.
"Yeah," he says, not caring at all that Chad can probably hear how much of a girl he's being right now. "I did."
