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Feb. 7th, 2009 10:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
longsufferinglyTitle: A Better Place Cannot Be Found
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Danneel Harris/Sophia Bush, girl!Jensen/girl!Jared, past Danneel/girl!Jensen
Rating: R.
Warnings: ....genderswitch high school AU?
Word Count: 1500 exactly!
Summary: Jen was Danneel's first girlfriend, but Sophia was her first love.
Notes: Follow up to Plastic Stars; I always kind of meant to do more with this 'verse, and thenkittyzams and inarticulate did some Danneel Harris femmeslash enabling, and because that is totally hot, I went with it.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Sophia taught Danneel to kiss when they were thirteen.
"What's it like, having boobs?" Danneel had asked, half joking, half serious, and Sophia had smirked.
"Want to feel and find out?"
Danneel didn't think it was the same, but she wanted it anyway, wanted it fiercely, so she smirked back, made a joke of it, made it a production, reached over and cupped Sophia's breast. They were huddled together in two different sleeping bags on Sophia's back porch, where anyone could see. Sophia was wearing her over-sized muppets shirt, the one she'd slept in since she was seven, and she shuddered when Danneel's hand came down, just the thin material between them, her nipple hardening against Danneel's palm. And, well, Danneel, she'd always kind of known that boys weren't what she wanted. But it had never been like this before.
She was supposed to move, and she knew it, but she didn't.
"Have you ever kissed anyone?" she asked instead.
"No. Have you?"
"Yeah."
Danneel swallowed, thinking about Sophia kissing someone. About her kissing someone else, some nameless, faceless boy, and her hand tightened, without her meaning it too, on Sophia's breast.
Sophia shivered, her eyes closed, and Danneel's mouth went dry.
"What's it like?" she managed.
"Want to find out?" Sophia asked.
She didn't actually answer, she didn't think, just found Sophia's mouth in the darkness, found her lips close and soft. She knew what kissing was, what French kissing was, even, from her older sister, and when Sophia's tongue nudged her lips she knew what to do, but she didn't know what it would be like. Didn't know how Sophia's tongue would slide against hers, how her throat would make noises without her telling it to, how she'd tremble, how it wouldn't be enough.
"That's how you kiss," said Sophia, and Danneel wanted to say, I didn't get that, show me again, but she didn't.
"Who've you been kissing?" she asked instead, and it turned it into the same kind of sleepover they always had, gossip about boys, about school, about friends.
Danneel's lips tingled the whole night, though.
*
Sophia was Danneel's first kiss, but Jen was her first girlfriend, and Danneel still loves Jen for it. Loves Jen for a lot of things, if she's honest. They just weren't the best couple--the sex was great, the chemistry was right, but something was always off.
"You were always in love with Sophia," Jen told her, a few weeks after they broke up. It's a testament to something that they moved so swiftly into friendship, easy and natural.
"You've never even met her," said Danneel. Sometimes she wondered how it would have been if Sophia came to St. Margaret's. How it would have been if they'd been together in high school too.
"I know," said Jen, slurping her ramen disgustingly. "Trust me."
Danneel didn't say anything, just flipped her off.
*
Sophia's boyfriend from ninth to eleventh grade was Chad, and he was a douchebag. Jen thought that Danneel just thought that because of residual, lasting resentment, but that's not right. Chad really was a douchebag, as proved when he cheated on Sophia with an eighth grader, which was skeevy and gross and wrong.
Sophia called Danneel as soon as the fight happened, and Danneel borrowed Jen's car after swearing up and down she'd take care of it and pay for gas and probably sell Jen her firstborn.
"You didn't have to come," Sophia said. "I'm fine."
Her eyes are tinged red and her hair is a mess and Jen at her best has never compared to Sophia, even for a second.
"I can see that. Happy birthday," said Danneel, holding out a bottle of Jack she swiped from Hilarie. She was going to get her ass kicked, probably, but it would be worth it.
"Happy," said Sophia, shaking her head. "Right."
But she took the bottle anyway.
*
It all goes to hell on a Thursday during senior year.
Jen comes downstairs looking happy and well-fucked, like the cat who got the canary, and she's leaning even more into her new roommate than she used to.
And the thing is, it's not like it wasn't obvious. It's not like Danneel had missed the way Jen lit up every time the girl came in, not like Danneel didn't know Jen was gone for Jared. And she's not even supposed to be sad about Jen, or bitter. They're friends, Jesus, they'd broken up like two years ago, and none of this should be a problem. She should be happy.
She calls Sophia.
"Blow off your classes," she says. "Blow off your classes and come get me and let's go anywhere."
"Okay," says Sophia.
*
"So," says Sophia, as they drive away from the school and back towards town. "When are you gonna tell me?"
Danneel stares out the window, watching the miles of nothing and farmland speed by. Sophia drives too fast, she always has. Back when they were six and riding bikes together and nothing was this complicated, Sophia still drove too fast. "You know I like girls, right?"
"Yeah," says Sophia. "I figured."
"Well," she says, "my ex-girlfriend just hooked up with someone else."
"When'd you break up?"
Danneel huffs out a laugh. "Sophomore year."
"God," says Sophia. "That's one hell of a torch, Harris."
Danneel has to laugh at that.
*
Danneel likes Jared, she does, even though she's way too tall and has a weird name and too-fluffy hair. She's clearly totally gone for Jen, which doesn't hurt. Jen deserves a girl who loves her, and Danneel has never been that girl. But she has trouble hanging out with them, when they're so happy, and so she goes home more weekends, runs to Sophia, who's single and willing to get drunk and smoke pot and say fuck the world.
It's Friday night and they're not that drunk or that stoned when it happens. Danneel's been bitching about Jen, just a little, because Jen's been so lovey-dovey with Jared this week Danneel almost can't handle it.
In a lull of conversation, Sophia says, "What's it like, being with a girl?" and Danneel recognizes the tone of voice, recognizes that she's not just asking for a description.
Danneel doesn't say anything, just leans over and gets Sophia's lips, kissing her softly, like they have all the time in the world, because Danneel wants to have this forever. And Sophia kisses back, just as soft, just their lips moving together, catching against each other.
Danneel lets Sophia take the lead, holding back because she's wanted this for so long she'll never forgive herself if she messes it up by being too eager. But Sophia doesn't disappoint her, pulls Danneel's shirt off and slips her hand under Danneel's bra, runs her thumb over Danneel's nipple. It's the weirdest deja-vu, reversed and turned upside down and Danneel moans into Sophia's mouth and goes with it, unhooking her own bra and sliding it off before pulling off Sophia's shirt.
It's still a cliche, going at it in her best friend's basement while her parents are out of town, but Sophia lowers her mouth and sucks a kiss into Danneel's neck and dips her hand into Danneel's jeans, so who the fuck cares about cliches.
*
Afterward, Danneel kisses the taste of herself out of Sophia's mouth as they lie together on the couch, and she's not sure if it's more because she wants to kiss Sophia or because she wants to not have to hear Sophia tell her this was a fluke.
*
"Hi," says Danneel to Jen, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Hi," says Jen, warily. Jared's in class and Jen and Danneel have study hall, and Danneel's maybe been planning this, stalking out a time and place to make things right. Or better.
"Look," says Danneel. "I know I've been a raging bitch ever since you and Jared hooked up."
"Yeah," says Jen, looking at her evenly.
"I know I've been shitty and stupid. And I know this is shittier and stupider, but I need a friend right now, and you're--the best one I've got."
Jen looks at her for a long minute and then says, "Okay."
Danneel sits down, puts her head in Jen's lap, lets Jen stroke her hair. "I slept with Sophia."
Jen's hand doesn't falter in her hair. "Was it good?"
Danneel closes her eyes, remembers. "Of course it was good."
"How drunk were you?"
"Not drunk enough."
"How drunk was she?"
"Not drunk enough."
"Have you talked to her?"
"No."
"Man, you suck," says Jen.
Danneel laughs. "I missed you, you raging bitch."
"I didn't go anywhere."
"Yeah," Danneel says. "I did."
*
She calls Sophia a week later.
"I can see why you do that," says Sophia, instead of saying hello.
"Do what?" asks Danneel.
"Lesbian sex."
Danneel swallows.
"I could see myself doing it a lot more," she continues.
"Yeah?" asks Danneel, somehow. "How about tonight?"
"Yeah. Come on over."
Author:
chashFandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Danneel Harris/Sophia Bush, girl!Jensen/girl!Jared, past Danneel/girl!Jensen
Rating: R.
Warnings: ....genderswitch high school AU?
Word Count: 1500 exactly!
Summary: Jen was Danneel's first girlfriend, but Sophia was her first love.
Notes: Follow up to Plastic Stars; I always kind of meant to do more with this 'verse, and then
kittyzams and inarticulate did some Danneel Harris femmeslash enabling, and because that is totally hot, I went with it.Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Sophia taught Danneel to kiss when they were thirteen.
"What's it like, having boobs?" Danneel had asked, half joking, half serious, and Sophia had smirked.
"Want to feel and find out?"
Danneel didn't think it was the same, but she wanted it anyway, wanted it fiercely, so she smirked back, made a joke of it, made it a production, reached over and cupped Sophia's breast. They were huddled together in two different sleeping bags on Sophia's back porch, where anyone could see. Sophia was wearing her over-sized muppets shirt, the one she'd slept in since she was seven, and she shuddered when Danneel's hand came down, just the thin material between them, her nipple hardening against Danneel's palm. And, well, Danneel, she'd always kind of known that boys weren't what she wanted. But it had never been like this before.
She was supposed to move, and she knew it, but she didn't.
"Have you ever kissed anyone?" she asked instead.
"No. Have you?"
"Yeah."
Danneel swallowed, thinking about Sophia kissing someone. About her kissing someone else, some nameless, faceless boy, and her hand tightened, without her meaning it too, on Sophia's breast.
Sophia shivered, her eyes closed, and Danneel's mouth went dry.
"What's it like?" she managed.
"Want to find out?" Sophia asked.
She didn't actually answer, she didn't think, just found Sophia's mouth in the darkness, found her lips close and soft. She knew what kissing was, what French kissing was, even, from her older sister, and when Sophia's tongue nudged her lips she knew what to do, but she didn't know what it would be like. Didn't know how Sophia's tongue would slide against hers, how her throat would make noises without her telling it to, how she'd tremble, how it wouldn't be enough.
"That's how you kiss," said Sophia, and Danneel wanted to say, I didn't get that, show me again, but she didn't.
"Who've you been kissing?" she asked instead, and it turned it into the same kind of sleepover they always had, gossip about boys, about school, about friends.
Danneel's lips tingled the whole night, though.
*
Sophia was Danneel's first kiss, but Jen was her first girlfriend, and Danneel still loves Jen for it. Loves Jen for a lot of things, if she's honest. They just weren't the best couple--the sex was great, the chemistry was right, but something was always off.
"You were always in love with Sophia," Jen told her, a few weeks after they broke up. It's a testament to something that they moved so swiftly into friendship, easy and natural.
"You've never even met her," said Danneel. Sometimes she wondered how it would have been if Sophia came to St. Margaret's. How it would have been if they'd been together in high school too.
"I know," said Jen, slurping her ramen disgustingly. "Trust me."
Danneel didn't say anything, just flipped her off.
*
Sophia's boyfriend from ninth to eleventh grade was Chad, and he was a douchebag. Jen thought that Danneel just thought that because of residual, lasting resentment, but that's not right. Chad really was a douchebag, as proved when he cheated on Sophia with an eighth grader, which was skeevy and gross and wrong.
Sophia called Danneel as soon as the fight happened, and Danneel borrowed Jen's car after swearing up and down she'd take care of it and pay for gas and probably sell Jen her firstborn.
"You didn't have to come," Sophia said. "I'm fine."
Her eyes are tinged red and her hair is a mess and Jen at her best has never compared to Sophia, even for a second.
"I can see that. Happy birthday," said Danneel, holding out a bottle of Jack she swiped from Hilarie. She was going to get her ass kicked, probably, but it would be worth it.
"Happy," said Sophia, shaking her head. "Right."
But she took the bottle anyway.
*
It all goes to hell on a Thursday during senior year.
Jen comes downstairs looking happy and well-fucked, like the cat who got the canary, and she's leaning even more into her new roommate than she used to.
And the thing is, it's not like it wasn't obvious. It's not like Danneel had missed the way Jen lit up every time the girl came in, not like Danneel didn't know Jen was gone for Jared. And she's not even supposed to be sad about Jen, or bitter. They're friends, Jesus, they'd broken up like two years ago, and none of this should be a problem. She should be happy.
She calls Sophia.
"Blow off your classes," she says. "Blow off your classes and come get me and let's go anywhere."
"Okay," says Sophia.
*
"So," says Sophia, as they drive away from the school and back towards town. "When are you gonna tell me?"
Danneel stares out the window, watching the miles of nothing and farmland speed by. Sophia drives too fast, she always has. Back when they were six and riding bikes together and nothing was this complicated, Sophia still drove too fast. "You know I like girls, right?"
"Yeah," says Sophia. "I figured."
"Well," she says, "my ex-girlfriend just hooked up with someone else."
"When'd you break up?"
Danneel huffs out a laugh. "Sophomore year."
"God," says Sophia. "That's one hell of a torch, Harris."
Danneel has to laugh at that.
*
Danneel likes Jared, she does, even though she's way too tall and has a weird name and too-fluffy hair. She's clearly totally gone for Jen, which doesn't hurt. Jen deserves a girl who loves her, and Danneel has never been that girl. But she has trouble hanging out with them, when they're so happy, and so she goes home more weekends, runs to Sophia, who's single and willing to get drunk and smoke pot and say fuck the world.
It's Friday night and they're not that drunk or that stoned when it happens. Danneel's been bitching about Jen, just a little, because Jen's been so lovey-dovey with Jared this week Danneel almost can't handle it.
In a lull of conversation, Sophia says, "What's it like, being with a girl?" and Danneel recognizes the tone of voice, recognizes that she's not just asking for a description.
Danneel doesn't say anything, just leans over and gets Sophia's lips, kissing her softly, like they have all the time in the world, because Danneel wants to have this forever. And Sophia kisses back, just as soft, just their lips moving together, catching against each other.
Danneel lets Sophia take the lead, holding back because she's wanted this for so long she'll never forgive herself if she messes it up by being too eager. But Sophia doesn't disappoint her, pulls Danneel's shirt off and slips her hand under Danneel's bra, runs her thumb over Danneel's nipple. It's the weirdest deja-vu, reversed and turned upside down and Danneel moans into Sophia's mouth and goes with it, unhooking her own bra and sliding it off before pulling off Sophia's shirt.
It's still a cliche, going at it in her best friend's basement while her parents are out of town, but Sophia lowers her mouth and sucks a kiss into Danneel's neck and dips her hand into Danneel's jeans, so who the fuck cares about cliches.
*
Afterward, Danneel kisses the taste of herself out of Sophia's mouth as they lie together on the couch, and she's not sure if it's more because she wants to kiss Sophia or because she wants to not have to hear Sophia tell her this was a fluke.
*
"Hi," says Danneel to Jen, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Hi," says Jen, warily. Jared's in class and Jen and Danneel have study hall, and Danneel's maybe been planning this, stalking out a time and place to make things right. Or better.
"Look," says Danneel. "I know I've been a raging bitch ever since you and Jared hooked up."
"Yeah," says Jen, looking at her evenly.
"I know I've been shitty and stupid. And I know this is shittier and stupider, but I need a friend right now, and you're--the best one I've got."
Jen looks at her for a long minute and then says, "Okay."
Danneel sits down, puts her head in Jen's lap, lets Jen stroke her hair. "I slept with Sophia."
Jen's hand doesn't falter in her hair. "Was it good?"
Danneel closes her eyes, remembers. "Of course it was good."
"How drunk were you?"
"Not drunk enough."
"How drunk was she?"
"Not drunk enough."
"Have you talked to her?"
"No."
"Man, you suck," says Jen.
Danneel laughs. "I missed you, you raging bitch."
"I didn't go anywhere."
"Yeah," Danneel says. "I did."
*
She calls Sophia a week later.
"I can see why you do that," says Sophia, instead of saying hello.
"Do what?" asks Danneel.
"Lesbian sex."
Danneel swallows.
"I could see myself doing it a lot more," she continues.
"Yeah?" asks Danneel, somehow. "How about tonight?"
"Yeah. Come on over."
