(no subject)

[longsufferingly]

Title: Life Came In the Way
Author: poor_choices
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None that I can think of!
Word Count: 2500.
Summary: Five years ago, Jared fell for his sister's fiance, and everything went wrong. And now his oldest friend is a movie star.
Notes: So, this is kind of, like--a J2 sequel to my favorite book ever, I Capture the Castle. So most of the things that are referenced as having happened earlier on are events from that book (or tweaked events), but the fic itself is not an adaptation. I feel like that was not a super helpful explanation. Whatever! Title from Hello Saferide.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.


Jared never saw it coming.

He knew, in an abstract sense, that Jensen had gone to Hollywood to become a model/actor/whatever, but he'd never expected to go into a movie and see him, there, on the big screen.

Jensen had been attractive when Jared knew him, obviously, but it was the familiar kind of attractive. The kind you got used to. He saw Jensen every day, and he was much more Jensen than anything else. He was sweet, and nice, and the best person Jared knew most of the time, and compared to that, how he looked never had mattered much.

Not until Jensen pushed the issue, anyway.

"Oh my god," says Genevieve, grinning at Jared as they leave the theater. "How cute was the best friend? He had freckles. Did you see the freckles? If I wasn't gay, I would be all over that. You should be all over that. You are, right? So cute."

Jared clears his throat, totally unsure how to respond to that. He can't disagree, exactly, except--well.

Except he turned Jensen down.

*

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful girl who lived in a beautiful castle, but she wasn't a princess. She was poor and often hungry and the castle was falling apart most of the time. The family had some issues.

She also had a little brother named Jared, and a housekeeper's son, named Jensen, left over from more prosperous times. And Jared spent most of his childhood convinced that Jensen was in love with his sister, which he approved of, even if Megan said Jensen wasn't rich enough to tempt her.

His sister had always been practical.

Then, it all went to hell, Jared discovered he was gay (falling in love with his sister's fiance), had a falling out with his sister (over said fiance), found out Jensen was gay (confessing his love for Jared), and ended up alone, because he felt like everyone in the world was in love with the wrong person.

So Jensen went to Hollywood, Jared got a scholarship to the University of Texas, and Megan got married. And, eventually, Jared's heart healed itself.

Piece by piece.

And apparently Jensen became the new hot thing in Hollywood.

*

Simply knowing that Jensen Ackles is a rising star (at least judging from his IMDB page, which not only exists, but is full of upcoming projects) doesn't actually give Jared any way of getting in touch with him. Or even a good reason to. He shouldn't get in touch with Jensen just because he's a big, attractive star now.

But that's not really why. The truth of it is, Jensen was Jared's best friend growing up. One of his only friends. And he misses Jensen, like he doesn't miss his sister, like he doesn't even miss Tom, and he was in love with Tom. If Jared's in LA, and Jensen is in LA, not getting in touch with him seems almost unthinkable.

"Is it an asshole move to try to reconnect with a guy whose heart you broke?" Jared asks Gen thoughtfully. They're the only two on right now, it's kind of a dead time of morning. He's doing his best to make it big as a screenwriter, but at the moment, he's just working at a coffee shop like every wannabe ever. He's seriously such a cliche.

Gen clucks her tongue. "How'd you break his heart?" she asks.

"He said he was in love with me," Jared admits. "And I said I was in love with someone else."

"How long ago?"

"Five years."

"Why are you thinking about getting in touch with him now?"

"I think he's in LA."

"Are you going to break his heart again?"

"He probably isn't still--"

"Oh my God," says Gen, eyes widening as she grips his arm tight.

"Huh?" asks Jared.

"Okay, Jared. You need to get laid. You never get laid. You are going to go and hit on that guy. I believe in you." With that, she spins him around and shoves him toward the counter. He barely manages to catch himself to keep from crashing into the cash register, and then he looks up.

"Sorry, I know that was--Jensen?"

Jensen looks about as surprised as Jared feels. He isn't as tall as he used to be, except he must be, because Jensen isn't shrinking. Mostly, Jared's grown, and he's horribly disconcerted to be taller than Jensen.

And then there's all the other things, like the fact that Jensen is gorgeous, just like he must have always been, and Jared mostly just wants to hug him. He feels almost too full of happiness to have Jensen right there in front of him.

"Jared?" Jensen says, disbelievingly.

"Hey," says Jared, and he can't help his grin spreading all over his face. "I, um. Hi!"

Jensen licks his lips, tongue flashing out and Jared is embarrassed by how distracting he finds it. This is Jensen. And he was the one who said no.

"Hi," Jensen says, in this small, shocked voice. "You--what are you doing here?"

"I work here," Jared offers, with a little shrug. "I, um. I saw your movie. The romantic comedy. My friend--" he looks around for Gen, but she's disappeared. "Uh. Well, she likes that kind of movie. You were really good?"

Jensen rubs the back of his neck, the same way he always did when he was embarrassed. "Thanks," he says. He licks his lips again. "I--we should hang out some time?" he offers. "I dunno. Dinner? Or--yeah."

Jared smiles. "We definitely should," he says. "I've been missing you, man."

Jensen still doesn't look all the way to happy, and Jared has this horrible, wild moment of hope. Like maybe Jensen--like maybe he still--

"Did you want your coffee?" Jared asks.

"Yeah," says Jensen. "Thanks."

By the time he's gone, they've got plans to meet up for dinner that night, and Jared feels antsy, unsure, and guilty as anything.

He turned Jensen down. He was an asshole. He's not allowed to have second thoughts.

*

"Spill," says Gen, dangerously.

"Um," says Jared. "Old friend?"

"You are old friends with Jensen Ackles? I googled him, he's gonna be huge! And you know him? Is he--oh shit, is he the guy you were asking about?"

"Maybe?" Jared says. He groans. "I was in love with someone else!"

"How? He's so pretty!"

"He's--he was our housekeeper's son. He was my best friend! I thought he was in love with my sister. I never even thought of him like that."

"Okay," says Gen. "Well, it's time to start. Seriously, you go to dinner, and you hit that, Jared. He's too pretty not to have sex with."

Jared rubs his face. "Thanks. That's helpful."

*

Jensen's waiting outside the restaurant when Jared arrives, dressed a little more slickly than he was at the coffee shop. A couple girls are talking to him, getting him to sign autographs, and Jensen looks comfortable and charming, big smile for both of them.

It hurts more than Jared can say the way the smile slips when he sees Jared. Seeing Jensen makes Jared happy, makes him want to dance; he hates that seeing him just makes Jensen sad.

"Hey," he says, with an awkward smile.

"Hi," says Jensen. He looks to the girls. "Sorry, my friend and I have a lot of catching up to do. But I'm always happy to meet new fans." He turns back to Jared, and now that he's closer, Jared can see the soft, genuine smile, and it kind of makes him feel gooey and awesome inside. He can't help tugging Jensen in a for a hug, still more than a little confused by the way Jensen tucks in so easily against him. He feels Jensen laugh, patting his back before pulling away. "Nice to see you too," he says, but his smile is wider now.

"I missed you, man!" says Jared. "Seriously, it's been way too long." He licks his lips. "I mean--"

"No, I agree," says Jensen. He jerks his head to the door. "You ready for dinner?"

"Yeah," says Jared. They get seated easily--the hostess obviously recognizes Jensen, and she smiles and flirts a little. Jensen is polite, charming even, and Jared can't quite stop looking at him.

"So, uh--how's your family?" Jensen asks, a little awkwardly, as they sit. "I saw your dad's got a new book out."

"Yeah," says Jared. "He's doing pretty well. Megan's good. She's actually expecting."

"Expecting?" Jensen asks, clearly surprised.

"Yeah," says Jared, ducking his head with a smile. "I'm gonna be an uncle."

"Wow," says Jensen. "Well, congrats. That's great." He licks his lips. "Is she, uh--still with Tom?"

"Yeah," says Jared. He smiles, a little wistfully. "I got over it. First love, you know?"

The waiter comes then, and Jensen looks away to order.

"So--big star, huh?" Jared asks, once he's gone.

Jensen flushes, clearly a little embarrassed by his success. "Not a big star," he says. "I'm doing well, I guess."

"Mr. Morgan was a big help," Jared says, trying not to sound too bitter. He never liked Mr. Morgan, not the way he looked at Jensen, not the way he treated him like he was a good-looking piece of meat. Like all there was to Jensen was his pretty face.

"At first," says Jensen, shrugging a little. "I didn't let him take over as my agent, though. I got some good contacts, and I dropped him."

"Really?" asks Jared.

"He got me into the business," says Jensen. "And I'm grateful. But--he wasn't a good choice for my career."

"Good," says Jared. "That's good."

"So--what are you doing in LA?" Jensen asks. "Acting?"

"No," says Jared. "Writing. I want to get into scripts. I tried books, but--I always felt like I was just trying to be my dad, I guess." He smiles. "I've got some feelers out, but no jobs yet."

Jensen drums his fingers on the table. "I could probably get you a few numbers, put you in touch with--"

"No," says Jared, horrified. "No, Jensen, that's not--I didn't want to see you because I wanted you to hook me up with a job. I just--god, I missed you."

Jensen stares for a minute, looking kind of lost and sad. Like he doesn't know what to do with Jared liking him. Jared doesn't know how to fix it.

"I didn't mean it like that," says Jensen, finally. "I know you weren't."

Jared licks his lips. "This is weird, right? I mean--it's been a while. And--I was kind of shitty to you. Before."

Jensen looks away. "You weren't shitty to me," he says, softly. "I mean--it's not your fault you didn't want me. And I knew you didn't. You were in love with someone else."

Jared swallows.

"I shouldn't have put that on you," says Jensen, firmly. "I shouldn't have--I just couldn't be around you, you know?"

"But you can now?" Jared asks, somewhere between hopeful and disappointed. If Jensen doesn't feel that way anymore, then they can be friends again, but some small, selfish part of Jared doesn't really know what he'll do if Jensen doesn't love him.

"I think so," says Jensen, and the waiter brings their food. Jensen changes the subject smoothly, over to Jared's job, and it's safer, easier.

Almost like they used to be.

*

"So, um," says Jared, hands stuffed in his pockets. Jensen offered him a ride home, and they're heading to his car. Jared's going a little slow; he's not really ready to be home yet. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No," says Jensen, sounding a little surprised by the question. "Why, do you?"

"No," says Jared. He licks his lips. "I've actually--well, I've never had a boyfriend."

Jensen looks up at him. "You haven't?"

Jared sighs. "I don't know. I guess I'm a romantic, you know? I've just--I was in love with Tom, and it was stupid. And it didn't work out. And there was--you," he admits. "I mean, I just--I thought if I couldn't give you a chance, then I shouldn't just," he rubs the back of his neck. "I shouldn't just be with some guy I didn't even care about. You know?"

Jensen stares, looking dumbfounded. "Jared, you shouldn't--I wouldn't have--"

"I know," Jared says quickly. "I just--I never wanted to."

He doesn't notice for a minute that Jensen isn't next to him, and when he turns back, he sees Jensen with his eyes closed, like he's thinking.

"Jensen?" he says, walking back toward him.

"I can't do this," Jensen says, laughing a little. "I thought I could. Really. But--" he gives Jared a little smile. "I'm not over you."

Jared's heart does this weird little flip-jolt, like it doesn't know how to feel. "Oh," he says, mostly just to say something.

"Yeah," says Jensen. "And apparently I still suck at--"

Jared believes in kissing. He believes that it means something, that you can tell something from it. He kissed Tom, and that was how he realized he loved Tom, and he kissed Jensen years ago, and he thought--that wasn't it.

This time, when he kisses Jensen, it's different. It's soft and slow, and Jensen whimpers a little, almost wounded, before he wraps his arms around Jared's neck and kisses back, like he just can't help it.

"I was so stupid," Jared says, resting his forehead against Jensen's as he pulls back. "Jensen, I would have given anything to be in love with you, but I couldn't--I couldn't do that to you. Be with you when I was--" he starts, but he feels out of words.

"So, uh, what are you doing to me now?" Jensen asks, cautious.

Jared smiles a little, leaning in to kiss Jensen again. It's not like kissing Tom, not exactly. Not the heart-stopping thrill of his first kiss, of something forbidden.

But he wants to do it forever.

"I missed you," says Jared. "And I'm not in love with anyone else. And you have no idea how happy I was when you said you weren't over me." He smiles, feeling hopeful and content, like something broken is finally sliding together. "So, if you're interested--"

This time, Jensen drags him down, kisses him dirty and deep. "I could give you a ride to my place," says Jensen, and then flushes. "Not for anything. I'm not going to de-virginize you on our first date. But I fucking missed you too."

Jared laughs. "Is it one of those awesome Hollywood pads?" he teases. "Lifestyles of the rich and famous?"

"It's okay," says Jensen, flushing. He can't stop smiling, and it makes Jared feel warm all over. "Nothing special."

"Well, I still want to see it," says Jared, draping his arm over Jensen's shoulders, easy as anything, and when Jensen leans into it, Jared feels his own smile widen. "And get to--what is it, the third date?"

Jensen laughs. "I dunno, that's pretty quick. You don't want too seem easy, right?"

"I don't think there's anywhere this counts as too easy, Jensen."

"Yeah," says Jensen, a little sadly. But he shakes it off and gives Jared a small smile. "But we got here, right?"

Jared knows he must look completely lovestruck and stupid right now, but he doesn't really care. "Yeah," he says. "We got here."