longsufferingly (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
longsufferingly) wrote2009-12-19 09:56 pm
longsufferingly) wrote2009-12-19 09:56 pm
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In case you are unaware, Thomas Kinkade's Christmas Cottage is premiering on Lifetime right now. It is a magical film about Jared Padalecki being SUPER DREAMY.
So here is 530 words of J2 gen about Jensen making fun of Jared. Because, you know. JARED'S ON LIFETIME.
"So, how are you going to celebrate?" asks Jensen.
Jared glances up. "Celebrate what?"
"Your big premiere."
"Dude, are you on something? I don't have--"
"Thomas Kinkade's Christmas Cottage," says Jensen. "Big Lifetime premiere."
Jared pauses for a long minute. "You keep up with the Lifetime schedule, man? There something you want to tell me?"
"I'm just saying," says Jensen. "I might have done soaps, but at least I'm not on fucking Lifetime."
Jared shrugs. "Chicks dig it."
"Middle-aged housewives disillusioned with their lives dig it."
"I think you mean cougars," says Jared.
Jensen laughs. "Whatever, man. You're on Lifetime. You are never gonna live this down."
*
"I think we should have a viewing party," says Jensen.
"We don't get Lifetime," Jared points out.
"December 19," says Jensen. "We'll be done filming, back in the states."
Jared raises his eyebrows. "You memorized when my movie was playing?"
"Lifetime. Premiere," says Jensen.
Jared snorts. "Okay, man. You can come over to San Antonio and we'll have a viewing party."
"I'm holding you to that," says Jensen. "There is no way I'm missing this, dude."
*
Jared opens the door in his tux.
Jensen stares.
"Are you coming in?"
"Why are you wearing a tux?"
"It's a premiere, right?" says Jared.
"You're wearing a tux," says Jensen. "You didn't wear a tux to the opening on Friday the Thirteenth."
"It didn't premiere on Lifetime," Jared points out. "If it did, I totally would have worn a tux." Jensen looks a little flummoxed, and Jared grins. "You coming in?"
"You mean we're actually watching this?"
"Are you kidding? You've been psyched for this for weeks, man. Can't shut up about it. I wouldn't want to deprive you."
"Oh shit," says Jensen.
Jared smirks.
"I did not think this through," says Jensen.
"You really didn't," Jared agrees cheerfully. "Come on, we gotta be there in time that I can walk down the red carpet as it starts."
"Please tell me you didn't actually set up a red carpet."
"Oh, but I did. You can be my arm candy."
"All that and I have to watch the movie?"
"Shut up, it's not as bad as you think." Jared considers. "Okay, it is. But I'm totally awesome."
"Of course you are," says Jensen.
"Flattery will not get you out of watching this."
"Fuck."
*
"That is two hours of my life I will never get back," says Jensen.
"You enjoyed it," says Jared. "I am awesome."
"Did you keep your scarves?"
"You're just jealous that you did theater instead of a Christmas movie," says Jared. "Is Lifetime gonna play A Few Good Men every Christmas? I don't think so."
"That's true."
"No cougars for you."
"You know I'm engaged, right?"
"Whatever, you love cougars."
"Next summer I'll make, uh," Jensen considers. "A Very Norman Rockwell Christmas."
Jared laughs. "And I'll wear a tux to the Lifetime premiere."
"Yeah?" asks Jensen.
"Yeah," says Jared. "Definitely."
"Supernatural'll probably be over by then," says Jensen, too casually.
"Yeah," says Jared, "but your Lifetime premiere, man. I'd be a pretty sucky best friend if I missed that."
Jensen grins. "Guess you would be."
So here is 530 words of J2 gen about Jensen making fun of Jared. Because, you know. JARED'S ON LIFETIME.
"So, how are you going to celebrate?" asks Jensen.
Jared glances up. "Celebrate what?"
"Your big premiere."
"Dude, are you on something? I don't have--"
"Thomas Kinkade's Christmas Cottage," says Jensen. "Big Lifetime premiere."
Jared pauses for a long minute. "You keep up with the Lifetime schedule, man? There something you want to tell me?"
"I'm just saying," says Jensen. "I might have done soaps, but at least I'm not on fucking Lifetime."
Jared shrugs. "Chicks dig it."
"Middle-aged housewives disillusioned with their lives dig it."
"I think you mean cougars," says Jared.
Jensen laughs. "Whatever, man. You're on Lifetime. You are never gonna live this down."
*
"I think we should have a viewing party," says Jensen.
"We don't get Lifetime," Jared points out.
"December 19," says Jensen. "We'll be done filming, back in the states."
Jared raises his eyebrows. "You memorized when my movie was playing?"
"Lifetime. Premiere," says Jensen.
Jared snorts. "Okay, man. You can come over to San Antonio and we'll have a viewing party."
"I'm holding you to that," says Jensen. "There is no way I'm missing this, dude."
*
Jared opens the door in his tux.
Jensen stares.
"Are you coming in?"
"Why are you wearing a tux?"
"It's a premiere, right?" says Jared.
"You're wearing a tux," says Jensen. "You didn't wear a tux to the opening on Friday the Thirteenth."
"It didn't premiere on Lifetime," Jared points out. "If it did, I totally would have worn a tux." Jensen looks a little flummoxed, and Jared grins. "You coming in?"
"You mean we're actually watching this?"
"Are you kidding? You've been psyched for this for weeks, man. Can't shut up about it. I wouldn't want to deprive you."
"Oh shit," says Jensen.
Jared smirks.
"I did not think this through," says Jensen.
"You really didn't," Jared agrees cheerfully. "Come on, we gotta be there in time that I can walk down the red carpet as it starts."
"Please tell me you didn't actually set up a red carpet."
"Oh, but I did. You can be my arm candy."
"All that and I have to watch the movie?"
"Shut up, it's not as bad as you think." Jared considers. "Okay, it is. But I'm totally awesome."
"Of course you are," says Jensen.
"Flattery will not get you out of watching this."
"Fuck."
*
"That is two hours of my life I will never get back," says Jensen.
"You enjoyed it," says Jared. "I am awesome."
"Did you keep your scarves?"
"You're just jealous that you did theater instead of a Christmas movie," says Jared. "Is Lifetime gonna play A Few Good Men every Christmas? I don't think so."
"That's true."
"No cougars for you."
"You know I'm engaged, right?"
"Whatever, you love cougars."
"Next summer I'll make, uh," Jensen considers. "A Very Norman Rockwell Christmas."
Jared laughs. "And I'll wear a tux to the Lifetime premiere."
"Yeah?" asks Jensen.
"Yeah," says Jared. "Definitely."
"Supernatural'll probably be over by then," says Jensen, too casually.
"Yeah," says Jared, "but your Lifetime premiere, man. I'd be a pretty sucky best friend if I missed that."
Jensen grins. "Guess you would be."